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Sore Arse

The dullness of spending a night in Heathrow airport was tempered somewhat when I paid a visit to the toilets and discovered blood running out of my arse. I was, needless to say, a bit shocked, and not having taken part in any bizarre sexual activities the only cause I could think of was sitting on the plane for such a long time. Anyway, I reckoned I would survive the night, despite Carita's attempts to take me to casualty, and when I awoke in the morning it appeared to have healed itself. So I saw Carita onto her flight, caught the coach up to Bristol, and went to Chris's flat. Carita called me back in the evening to say that she'd spoken to her doctor who had remotely diagnosed me (without even a photo of my arse) with possible minor haemorrhoids! I, of course denied it, arguing that only old women got those, but apparently our recent bouts of diarrhoea, constipation, and spending weeks sitting on trains, buses, and planes, could well have caused it.

So it looks as if between that and smashing my knee up in Bangkok (I thought I could fly like superman if I ran fast enough but I couldn't), it's maybe not such a good idea to go off cycling this week as I'd planned to. In fact just sitting down is a bit uncomfortable, but at least I've got a memento of the trip!


If u was so high u thought u could fly
like superman how do u know u and some
lady boy had not undertook some bizare
activity....such as origarmie or what ever
it is called over there !!!


Are you sure you haven't got some nasty parasite? Was it just blood, or worms too?

Well, it was a bit like in Aliens, but it came out of my arse...
Actually, we are beginning to wonder if we've got worms as well. Is it some petrol you're supposed to drink to get rid of them... or will aftershave do??

wait till they develop and u can pull a handful out;still attached and play them like a harp[tune each string first otherwise u will upset observers and listeners]

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