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I seem to have developed

I seem to have developed dog ears as whenever I go swimming they fill up
with water and it's days before I can hear anything again. I spend all my
time shouting at people and telling them to speak up. Today, I caught the
bus to Palma and enjoyed a lovely day in civilisation, but came back to
Porto Colom to find the boat rolling like mad in the bay. After a brief
session of bouncing around inside, I decided to seek refuge in a local bar
and took the dinghy ashore. It wasn't the roughest dinghy trip I've ever
had, but it was bad enough for a fish to jump out of the water and into the
boat to escape from the sea.

In the bar, however, I met a new chum, Lucas, an Argentinian (don't mention
the (Falklands) war!), who is unable to pronounce my name and instead calls
me Bernie. He told me many happy stories of typical days growing up in
Argentina; of being robbed at gunpoint for one dollar as a fifteen year-old.
Apparently, his car was stolen recently and having discovered who took it
he's off to kill the person tomorrow and hence was out celebrating tonight.
All in all it was enough excitement for one day, and so I'm about to climb
into bed and hang on all night to avoid being thrown onto the floor.

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