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Clyde Rescue

Ged came through to Glasgow today and, seeing a police helicopter hovering just around the corner, we walked over to the river and saw a woman who'd apparently just jumped into the River Clyde. It probably isn't the best place to attempt to kill yourself, however, as the drop from the bridge into the water is only 15m and the river is just about 150m wide, so you're much more likely just to get cold and wet. We stood and watched as the police arsed around on the riverbank and hovered low in the helicopter wondering what to do whilst a member of the public dropped a lifering to her from another bridge downstream. By this time paramedics had joined the police on the river bank and were shouting the helpful advice, "Swim over here!" As we watched this pathetic attempt of a rescue, the woman began to sink under the cold water, and it looked very much as if she was beginning to drown.

Finally, after about fifteen minutes, in what you might have expected to see in a third world country, an old man appeared towing a rowing boat behind his car. This, they eventually managed to launch into the water, and paddled over to where the woman was. She, of course, was having nothing to do with being rescued and proceeded to fight off the two men in the boat who were trying to lift her over the side. The rowing boat then came very close to capsizing before they decided to give her a good slapping around the head and drag her onboard. One of them then had to lie on top of her to stop her fighting back as they rowed to shore.

About a quarter of an hour after this, Ged and I were crossing back over the bridge when a proper rescue boat turned up looking for the person in the water - apparently they'd not even been told that she'd been recovered.


I'm starting to think that this sort of thing is actually the norm for homosapiens all over the planet earth, either that or Texas is contagious...

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